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Bagel puns 🥯 in 2023

How do you make Bagels?…
– You use a little Judo.

What kind of bagel can fly?
– A plain bagel.

What kind of bagel did shamanist Carlos Castaneda prefer to eat?
– He liked the Astral plain ones!

What do you call a bagel in fancy dress?
– A donut.

The bagel and a pastor were having a big quarrel about purity and holiness. The bagel angrily replied, “I am holier than thou”.

What kind of bagel can fly?
– A plain bagel.

If Superman came from the planet of bagels, his original name would have been Bag-El.

Ever since I became a pilot, I can only eat one type of bagel.
– Plain.

My boss brought bagels for breakfast and asked me which one I wanted. I said “give me one of the Spanish bagels”. He responded ” One of the Spanish Bagels?”
– Ay poppy

Protect your bagels.
– Put lox on them.

What kind of pain is worse than donut stings?
– When a Bagel bites.

The seagulls fly above the sea for what reason?
– If they flew over the bay, they would be bagels!

It is not easy to trust bagels, and so you shouldn’t. They seem seedy at times!

Bagels have huge trouble putting make-up on them. No matter what happens, they always schmear it!

Prisoners are served only plain bagels as the authorities are concerned they may pick up the lox!

What’s a pilot’s favorite kind of bagel?
– Plain.

A bagel is halloween the middle.

What kind of a bagel did the smart man eat?
– He ate an everything special bagel!

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