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Lobster Puns

Lobsters may be the ocean's most dramatic crustaceans — bright red, armed with claws, and somehow always at the center of a fancy dinner. We've shelled out 30 puns in their honor, and they're all absolutely claw-some.

  1. That lobster chef is absolutely claw-some in the kitchen.
  2. Why did the lobster blush? It saw the ocean's bottom.
  3. I tried to share my lobster dinner, but I was too shellfish.
  4. What do you call a lobster who tells jokes? A crusta-comedian.
  5. The lobster got a promotion because he always gave it his claw-some best.
  6. Why don't lobsters ever share? They're a little pinch-y about their stuff.
  7. What's a lobster's favorite subject in school? Claw-culus.
  8. The lobster proposed at sunset — it was a real shell-of-a-moment.
  9. Why did the lobster cross the road? To get to the butter side.
  10. The lobster band's new album is a total shell-shaker.
  11. I told a lobster a secret and he swore to keep it under his shell.
  12. What do you call a lobster who won't stop talking? A jaw-ster.
  13. The lobster was a great negotiator — he always knew where to draw the claw.
  14. Why did the lobster refuse to fight? He didn't want to get into a pinch.
  15. That lobster novelist writes shell-ling bestsellers every year.
  16. What do lobsters drink at fancy parties? Crus-ta-cean champagne.
  17. The lobster was caught lying — his story just didn't hold water.
  18. Why was the lobster good at tennis? Killer backhand claws.
  19. What do you call a lobster who becomes a lawyer? A legal claw-yer.
  20. The lobster marathon runner set a new boil-er room record.
  21. Why don't lobsters do well in school? They always shell out excuses.
  22. That lobster artist only paints in shell-tered studios.
  23. What's a lobster's favorite movie? The Little Mer-claw-maid.
  24. The lobster accountant always balanced his books to the last pinch.
  25. Why did the lobster start meditating? To find his inner peas — sorry, inner peace.
  26. That lobster is so charming — he has a real way of buttering people up.
  27. What do you call a lobster who fixes things? A handy-clawman.
  28. The lobster sommelier swirled his glass and declared it "full-bodied with notes of brine."
  29. Why did the lobster turn red at karaoke? He hit a high shell note.
  30. I asked the lobster for directions and he said, "Take a left at the claw-nerstone."

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