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Salad puns 🥗 in 2022

Leaf me alone!

What did the priest say to the salad before he ate it?
– Lettuce pray.

I didn’t take the job at the salad bar because the celery was too low.

I’ve been thinking of you.

Why did the carrot visit a psychic?
– To get its carrot cards read.

Where did the salad dressing go for rehab?
– The Mayo Clinic

That was a close kale.

We were eating caesar salad, then i stabbed it.
– ‘Now its a real ‘Caesar’ salad’

Joe had this awful dream last night he was making a salad. He was tossing all night.

That romaines a mystery…

I made a chicken salad this morning. This stupid thing is he won’t eat it.

I think I will never have the Neverland-Ranch on my salad again.

What horror movie do all vegetables love?
– The silence of the Yams.

The corn farmer doesn’t like to make plans—he prefers to play everything by ear.

I asked my SO why she could be a healthy salad.
– Because I get you undressed

If you know any good jokes about salad, lettuce know will you!

Wife: I know you don’t like olives, but there are so many in this salad. I can’t get them out.
Me: Olive

Lettuce celebrate!

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