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Sewing puns 🧵 in 2022

A porcupine felt cold at night so he covered himself in a quill-t.

Last night’s kitty party was totally knit.

I’m trying to think of a sewing pun but I’m really struggling. I needle the help I can get.

How did you know the thief was a seamstress? She seemed to be following a pattern.

Look there they are all my scissors. Still sharp and neatly ordered. Said no seamstress ever.

A tailor did his bachelor’s degree in law, and now that he has become a lawyer, he is sewing people.

A doctor hurt himself and insisted on stitching himself. The other doctor said “Suture self”.

“Why couldn’t Santa convince the quilter to come to visit? he didn’t have enough backing.”

Sew glad we’re friends

Sewing is cheaper than Therapy

You can make fun about my knitting, but remember, I’m the one with the pointy sticks.

Every time I start sewing, I can knot find my needles.

He just can’t stop making jokes on denim, seems like it’s in his jeans.

Me: What a serger of puns.

Two sewing machines were walking down the road. As they pass by each other one says to the other “Hey are you that Singer?” The other replies “Janome?”.

Dear Lord, please let me come home before my online orders of fabric arrives. Or at least before my husband.

A porcupine’s favorite hobby is quilting.

Stop procrasti-knit-ting: leaving all the work and start knitting.

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