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knitting puns 🧶 in 2022

Woman driving along the road while knitting. Cop rolls down his window and shouts “Pullover maam”!
– Woman shouts back, “no actually, its a scarf.”

You will always find the needle near a swimming spool during his summer vacations.

This Halloween I’m going to dress my pet sheep like a wolf. I’ll call him ‘Woolverine’.

When I started knitting I forgot how to cook

Serial killers that knit are easy to find. All you have to do is follow the patterns.

My grandmother is a very wise knitter. She offers a lot of purls of wisdom that can be applied to everyday life.

Papa needle wore a suit for his son’s school graduation. “You’re looking really sharp”, remarked his son.

All fancy yarn traders live on wool street.

There’s a nutcase going around our town stabbing people with knitting needles.
Twelve individuals have been attacked in the last 48 hours.
The Police have announced that the attacker could be following some kind of pattern

A cop pulled up to her & yelled “Pullover!”
She yelled back, “No, they’re mittens!”

My brother couldn’t decide what sweater he wanted to buy. I felt that he was being too knit-picky.

I needle to knit today.

Don’t ever get influenced by salespeople that knit. They can really spin a yarn.

I’m not scared of needles, I just find them to be really weird. They seem to get under my skin a lot.

My sister couldn’t stop raving about her new wool obsession. It was driving me up the wool.

To knit or not to knit, now that’s just a silly question!

A Volley of Knitting Puns
My wife was teaching her best friend how to knit. She was doing quite well but for some extra encouragement I said:

“The basics are simple enough. It’s when you get into the knitty gritty that things start to unravel.

Wife and friend shake their heads, so I say “Sorry, I didn’t mean for my purls of wisdom to needle you.”

More groans…

“Still,” I said, “at least I kept it short and sweet. I mean, I could’ve spun you a proper yarn.”

Wife to friend: “Right, pass me that soddin’ knitting needle…!”

Fabricadabra

A needle surgeon specializes in syringery.

Sheep want to wool the whole world.

I can’t seem to think of any puns related to knitting. I think I have finished all of my material.

A person who can knit their own clothes is knot sub-par by any standard.

A woman accidentally stole a pair of wool socks from the local clothing department store. She didn’t return them because of cold feet.

Knitting: so many purls of wisdom.

What’s the appeal of round-tipped knitting needles?
– They seem pointless.

A man stopped replaced his knitting needles with a sewing machine. “They all look pointless to me now”, he said.

I have my first wool store opening tomorrow. “I hope it goes wool”, my mother prayed.

Housework is for those who do not know how to knit.

It’s easy to thread down the wrong path when you get carried away whilst knitting.

A woman had a lot of trouble trusting her knitting friend. She thought her friend always spun a yarn.

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