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Accounting puns in 2025

What did the accounting CPA get up to as a child?
– He used to account ants of course.

What is every accountant searching for ultimately?
– The meaning of LIFO.

Where there’s a will, there’s inheritance tax.

It’s 4:04.
– Do you know where your auditor is?

If an accountant’s wife cannot sleep, what does she say?
– “Darling, could you tell me about your work.”

A business owner tells her friend that she is desperately searching for an accountant.
– Her friend asks, “Didn’t your company hire an accountant a short while ago?”
– The business owner replies, “That’s the accountant I’ve been searching for.”

If it’s raining really hard you can be sure to find your accountant hiding under the tax shelter.

You know you are an accountant when
… You can easily find the balance (even at Yoga classes)!

It’s accrual world.

An accountancy student asks a partner to explain ethics in accountancy.
– The partner thinks for a moment and relates the following.

What do you call a trial balance that doesn’t balance?
– A late night.

When an accountant is facing a huge issue they say they have a mammath problem on their plate.

Why do accountants need such big libraries?
– Because they have so many books to keep.

What do you call an accountant without a spreadsheet?
– Lost.

How many accountants does it take to change a light bulb?
– How much money do you have?

What did the overworked accountant say to the other accountant?
– I feel so under depreciated.

A man was told by a doctor that he only had six months to live.
– The doctor advised him to marry an accountant. “Why?” he asked, “Will it make me live longer?”
– The doctor replied: “No, but it will make those six months seem much longer.”

What is the definition of “accountant”?
– Someone who solves a problem you didn’t know you had in a way you don’t understand.

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