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Accounting puns 📒 in 2023

What did the accounting CPA get up to as a child?
– He used to account ants of course.

Skunks don’t have to pay taxes
– because they only have one scent.

Why did an accountant cross the road?
– Because he looked at the records and that’d just what they did last year.

What is the definition of a good tax accountant?
– Someone who has a loophole named after him.

A fine is a tax for doing wrong. A tax is a fine for doing well.

How many accountants does it take to change a light bulb?
– How much money do you have?

After maths, the accountant’s favorite class in high school was fiscal education.

Why do accountants make good philosophers?
– Because they are always occupying themselves with meta-fiscal questions.

Have you heard the joke about the interesting accountant?
– No. Me neither.

What do you call a group financial controller who’s lost his job?
– Bob.

For every tax problem there is a solution that is straightforward, uncomplicated, and wrong.

When an accountant boards the train they are always careful to mind the GAAP.

What did the accountant say to his client when the client complained about the tax return?
– Sorry, but that’s as good as it nets.

What’s an extroverted accountant?
– One who looks at your shoes while he’s talking to you instead of his own.

Did you hear about the deviant Forensic Accountant?
– He got his client’s charges reduced from gross indecency to net indecency.

What did the accountant say when he got a blank check?
– My deductions have at last caught up with the salary.

Every single person in the accounting department counts.

Why does Dior need accountants?
– Because they have so many scents.

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