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Computer puns in 2024

My father got a new laptop, and it is now like the baby computer of the house, so we refer to the older laptop as the ‘Data’.

Why do programmers never run the AC?
– They prefer to open windows.

The WiFi and computer will always have a happy married life because they share a strong connection.

A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing.

PATIENT: Doctor, I need your help. I’m addicted to checking my Twitter!
– DOCTOR: I’m so sorry, I don’t follow.

What is a computer’s favorite animal?
– A RAM.

What did the spider do on the computer?
– Made a website!

What is a computer virus?
– A terminal illness!

Why did the computer keep sneezing?
– It had a virus!

Computers cannot make good boxers because their bark is worse than their byte.

Why did the computer spy get fired?
– She couldn’t hack it.

I sat down by my computer after a long time, and there was a hacker who had illegally developed a website on my computer. It was a highly skilled spider looking right at me.

Programming today is a race between software engineers striving to build bigger and better idiot-proof programs, and the Universe trying to produce bigger and better idiots. So far, the Universe is winning.

What did Stephen Hawking say when his computer crashed?

– Nothing.

Autocorrect can go straight to he’ll.

Did you hear about the woman whose daughter adopted a baby?
– Instagram.

We have ten types of people.
– One understands binary, and the other doesn’t.

My computer is taking non-stop screenshots.
– I know for sure it is not in its right mind.

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