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Construction puns in 2024

Would you like to hear a construction joke?
– [Yes] Well I’m still working on it.

Bricks are the happiest construction materials.
They’re always getting laid.

The shovel remains one of the most groundbreaking construction tools ever.

There’s this new workout for construction workers where you have to hit garden buildings. It is a good thing
– because I’m looking to pound some sheds.

I heard the replacement window installers quit soon after they started their job. Apparently, they feel it’s a real pane.

Where in the Bible does Jesus bequeath his woodworking tools?
– The Axe of the Apostles!

I was having an argument about construction with someone on reddit.
He said he never had any issues with mis-calculations during construction on houses and I said that’s impossible.

I told him in response about a time I put a post in the ground at a bad angle and had to take it out and put it back in correctly.

He got mad at me because he had heard the same exact story on r/construction

I guess you could call it a repost

The first carpenter did a bad job and screwed the furniture up but the second one nailed it.

I knew a guy who operated a steamroller for a living. He was known to be quite good with flattery.

Want to hear a joke about construction?
– I’m still working on it!

The wasted concrete slabs are buried under the ground. We call the place a cementery.

My father always wanted to be a plumber for a construction company, but his plans ended up being nothing but a pipe dream.

Why do dogs make great construction workers? They’re natural roofers.

How does construction workers party ?
– They raise the roof.

Do you wanna hear a joke about construction
– Never mind I’m still working on it

Did The Doors hold jamb sessions?

We visited a zoo last week that was partially under construction. I saw a snake wearing a construction hat. I guess that was a boa constructor.

I was helping my dad with construction he told me to get the hammer but I accidentally gave him the drill
– He said I could have nailed it, but I screwed up

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