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Squirrel puns ๐Ÿฟ๏ธ in 2021

Sorry seems to be the hardest word to say… Unless you’re Chinese. Then it’s ‘squirrel’.

What did the racing pigeon say to the racing squirrel?
– Don’t act like a nut and try to beat me because you walnut be able to go faster than me.

Why didnโ€™t the squirrel cross the telephone line?
– Because it was busy.

Where do squirrels go when they have a nervous breakdown?
โ€“ To the nut-house.

Why do squirrels like to sit on telephone poles?
– To stay away from the nuts on the ground.

What did the squirrel say to the police dog?
– Stop barking up the wrong tree and don’t act like a nut.

My son asked me how to tell a boy squirrel from a girl squirrel.
– I told him to check for nuts.

Which ballet do squirrels like best?
– The nutcracker.

What do you call a squirrel that goes to space?
– An astro-nut

This thread is going to get so a-corny.

A wise squirrel once said “you are what you eat”. He was nuts.

What do you get if you cross a squirrel with a kangaroo?
– An animal that keeps its nuts in its pockets.

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