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Baby puns in 2025

We decided to have a baby just for shits and giggles.

Newborns given birth to on holidays are usually females because there are no mail deliveries on holidays.

My friend’s gambling is getting out of hand.
– He just bet his newborn son in our game of poker.
– And I thought I might have to raise him.

How can you tell if a snake is a baby?
– It has a rattle.

What did Joseph say when changing Jesus’s first diaper?
– “HOLY SHIT!”

Tell me, does the stork deliver babies with their diapers on?
– No, they’re stork naked!

What is the difference between a man and childbirth?
– One can be terribly painful and sometimes almost unbearable, while the other is just having a baby.

A boat with a baby dinghy is called a mothership.

How should you treat a baby goat?
– Like a kid.

How does a baby ghost cry?
– “Boo-hoo! Boo-hoo!”

All the baby turkeys who were upset over the football result were crying fowl.

Did you hear the joke about Sean Connery’s brother’s newborn daughter?
– It’s a little niche.

Did you hear about the baby born in a high-tech hospital?
– It came out cordless.

When potatoes have babies, what are they called?
– Tater tots.

What do you do with a fussy baby girl?
– You pacify her!

How did it work out for the lady who had a sea section?
– She gave birth to a bouncing baby buoy.

A cow’s newborn is usually called a moo-born.

Why was the baby strawberry crying?
– Because his mom and dad were in a jam.

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