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Baby puns in 2024

I told my friends a joke about birth complications, but no one laughed.
– It must have come out wrong.

If you are supposed to learn from your mistakes, why do some people have more than one child?
– What did the mother cow say to the baby cow?
– “It’s pasture bed time.”

If you want an astronaut’s baby to sleep, you need to rocket.

The best remedy for a baby pig suffering from a diaper rash is an oinkment.

A baby’s laugh is one of the most beautiful things you will ever hear…
– Unless it is 3 a.m., you’re home alone, and you don’t have a baby.

What did the baby dolphin do when he didn’t get his way?
– He whale-d.

You can’t just ignore a lady with a huge belly. It’s the elephant in the womb.

Did you hear about the lady who traveled to the ocean to have her baby?
– She needed a sea section.

Pregnant bed bugs usually give birth to their newborns in the spring.

There was a dad who tried to keep his wife happy through labor by telling jokes, but she didn’t laugh once.
Know why?
– It was the delivery.

I saw my son playing with a used diaper while the air conditioner was on.
– It was all fun and games until the shit hit the fan.

Two babies got switched in the hospital after someone was asked to change them.

A newborn baby is usually born at womb temperature.

Why do we dress babies in onesies?
– Because they can’t dress themselves.

What do you call a boat that just got a baby dinghy?
– A mother ship.

Mom: “You’re growing up now, so you don’t need a bottle all the time.”
– Baby: “I could say the same to you, mother.”

A woman in labor suddenly shouted, “Shouldn’t! Wouldn’t! Couldn’t! Didn’t! Can’t!”
– “Doctor, what’s going on?” asked the concerned father-to-be.
– “Don’t worry,” said the doctor. “Those are just contractions.”

I don’t ever ignore a largely pregnant mom because it is an elephant in the womb.

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