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Bagel puns in 2025

Customer: “I’d like to buy a bagel with cream cheese.”
Cashier: “Sorry, we only accept cash.”

What is the favorite type of bagel for a mathematician?
– A three-dimensional plain bagel!

How do you describe someone who stands on one foot, eats a bagel and a banana?
– A balanced breakfast.

I left my bag of flour and pet fish in my apartment when there was a fire, I went back in to find a smoked salmon bagel.

What kind of bagel can fly?
– A plain bagel.

In addition to croissants, bagels and donuts took a trip to the zoo.
They were of the opinion that it would be a lovely experience for the hole family!

What’s Mario’s favorite bagel flavor?
– Ses-a-ME! Mario!

What type of bagels can fly
– Plain bagels

What kind of cheese does Tom Hanks put in his bagel?
– Philadelphia cheese!

Recently, I came across a Frenchman wearing a bagel as a scarf.
It was a real pain in the neck, he said.

I visited the doctor, and he prescribed me a new diet plan, so I have decided to eat only bagels and donuts from today. My doctor has asked me to eat only hole foods!

I did very poorly in my class tests and wasn’t feeling good. I decided to warm my bagel, and now I feel a lot butter!

What kind of bagel can fly?
– A plain bagel

A bagel calls its grandfather what?
– Poppy.

Do you know that a religious person should have bagels for breakfast everyday?
– They are as holy as food can get.

How does a bagel address his grandfather?
– He calls him by saying ‘Poppy’.

Where does a bagel go to get tanned and hot?
– To a toaster.

What do you call a bagel with wings?
– A plane bagel.

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