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Baseball puns in 2025

The only thing tender today is my heart for you

A book never written:
– “How to Be a Better Baseball Player” by Ben Schwarmer.

“Did you hear the joke about the fast pitch?”…
– ”Forget it. You just missed it.”

BTW, if you put the squeeze on her, don’t pinch her.
– And definitely don’t hitter! And for god’s sake, don’t batter her around!

What is a baseball player’s favorite thing about going to the park?…
– The swings!

If you were a baseball and I was a bat would you let me hit that?

Obviously, Paul is away
— not home. He’s a busy guy, with a lot on his plate.

What are the rules in zebra baseball?…
– Three stripes and you’re out.

When a baseball fell in the sewer it was called a foul ball.

You’re like baseball: A thinkin’ man’s game.

Why was Cinderella so bad at baseball?
– She had a pumpkin for a coach!

What’s long and hard and intimidates everyone?
– My BAT. Isn’t it adorable?

I feel like I’m talking to myself. I guess you’re busy.
– I’ll take a walk and come back later.

In each town on his trip, the baseball player made a short stop.

A baseball player joined the army and did the round of military bases.

Baseball players only wear one glove so they can leave the other hand free to hold girls like you.

A baseball player was a thief.
– He was always trying to steal.

Unlike Dee Gordon,
– I give you full permission to tag my butt

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