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Chair puns in 2024

Stevie Wonder walks into a bar…
– And a table, and a chair

My chair had a weird problem. It would suddenly get very warm and needed to be cooled down.
My carpenter suggested that I turn on the chair conditioner.

What name did the Spanish people give to musical chairs?
– They call it the despa-seat-o.

How many morons does it take to change a lightbulb?
14,000.
1 to hold the lightbulb, 4 to hold the chair, and 13,995 to spin the house.

Did you know that Thomas Jefferson invented the swivel chair
– Guess he really loved Revolutions after all.

I was extremely sad when my grandpa’s favorite rocking chair got destroyed in the earthquake.
I will always chairish the memories.

I have never seen a chair with wheels be this rusty and move this slow. What is this, a sloth chair?

Dad: What has 4 legs and isn’t alive?
Me: You can’t fool me dad! Its a chair!
Dad: Not this time son. Get a shovel, the dog’s dead

While helping my friends take his furniture and other stuff to a new house, I was horrified when I broke a beautiful old chair that she had.
I profusely apologized for it,
– but she said it was okay because she couldn’t chair less about it.

A dad asks his son, “What has four legs but isn’t alive?”
– The son says,”Nice try dad, a chair!”

– “Not this time son, our dog is dead”

My girlfriend broke up with me. So I took her wheel chair and…
– Guess who came crawling back.

One day, I went to take up a job at the furniture removal center.
When I reached there, the interviewer said, “Take a seat”.

Why did my rock band buddies love sitting on my father’s old chair?
– Because you know, it always rocked.

You have been charged guilty for clickbait, and will now have to use the electric chair
– What happens next will shock you

I couldn’t decide whether to use a chair or step stool to reach the top shelf…
– I went with the ladder.

My father would always store extra chairs in the garage
– so that we could be prepared if there were any emergency seat-uations.

As the chair realized that it was going to be chopped down to be used in making other furniture, it started singing the song ‘Love Will Chair Us Apart!”

A murderer is to be executed by electric chair and the priests asks if he has any last request.
– The man asks for the priest to hold his hand. Needless to say, the priest was shocked

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