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Chair puns in 2025

A murderer, sitting in the electric chair, was about to be executed.
Have you any last requests? asked the chaplain.
Yes, replied the murderer. Will you hold my hand?

I got in a fight with a guy in a wheel chair the other day
– He won’t be walking for weeks

I once tried to do a daredevil stunt by eating pieces of a broken chair.
Well, it didn’t really sit well with my digestive system and stomach.

What do you call a chair that is kept in a castle among the mountains?
– You call it a high chair.

I got a chair which acts up weirdly during stormy weather and gets all kinds of sores on it.
I think I shouldn’t have bought a Windsor chair.

Mexican word of the day: wheelchair
– Theirs only 1 taco left, so wheel chair.

How many Buzzfeed writers does it take to turn on an electric chair?
– Ten. But number four will shock you.

My friend was astounded to see me having possession of one of the vintage recliners from the early 20th century.
I told him that my recliner and I go way back.

How do you make a chair made of fake wood or plastic turn into a chair made of the best quality wood?
– You pass it through the chair purifier!

“Hey son, what has 4 legs and doesn’t breathe?”
“Haha you can’t fool me again, dad. A chair!”
“Not this time. Our dog died.”

My girlfriend broke up with me. So I took her wheel chair and…
– Guess who came crawling back.

When Michael Jordan announced that he would bringing a new furniture line in the market, we all knew the name of the company would be Chair Jordan.

The Irishman who is always looking forward to repairing chairs and furniture is called Paddy O’ Furniture.

Why is it wrong to bully people in wheel chair?
– Because they can’t stand up for themselves.

Raven had recently ordered a chair from a shop, they were supposed to deliver by this week, but called her up yesterday to let her know that they were canceling the order due to low stocks.
Well, this is one of the cons of buying a cantdeliver chair.

Helen Keler walked into a bar
– then a table…..then a chair.

I have the eyes of an artist, the mind of a scientist, the hands of a pianist, and the heart of a child.
– Now I’m getting the electric chair after I was caught trying to get the liver of a politician.

When Senator Percy Chair became President of the United States, the president’s plane was known as Chair Force One.

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