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Clock puns in 2025

I saw a billboard with a watch on it. I think it was a sign of the time.

I was going to grow some herbs but I couldn’t find the thyme…

Went to a fancy dress party as an alarm clock. Got really irritated, everyone was winding me up.

My grandfather’s pendulum stopped moving out of nowhere. I think it lost its swing.

I was thinking about an old car I owned that got stuck in first gear. That took me back.

The wristwatch didn’t believe the story the clock was telling it. It was second hand information.

Have you ever tried eating a clock?
– It’s really time-consuming, especially if you go for seconds.

If her age is on the clock she gets the cock

What did the wall clock do after it stopped ticking?
– It just hanged around.

Why should you never dress up as an alarm clock at a fancy dress party?
– People might end up winding you up.

My best friend and I played hide and seek today. It went on for hours. Good friends are hard to find.

What did the robber say to the clock?

– Hands up!

I don’t have time to write this joke.

Why do you think there was a clock in the forest?
– Because it was a time-out.

It is never good to talk about secrets around a watch because time will tell.

They’re finally making a movie called clocks. It’s about time.

Why did the kid throw the clock out the window he wanted to see time fly

My mother has a fascinating, tense clock. But it is all wound up.

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