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Grape puns in 2024

What did the green grape say to the purple grape?
– Breathe grandpa, or they will have to put you in the box! (Raisin joke on top)

On my 16th birthday, the grape daughter looked at her grape mom and said,
– “You did a grape job raisin me”.

The reason that the story of each raisin is so tragic is because those grapes all could have gone on to become wine.

What happens to a grape when an elephant steps on it?
– It lets out a little whine.

The grape teacher loved teaching. When we asked her how she manages, she said, “Teaching is my jam”, she truly is a grape.

A grape walked into a fruit mixer and didn’t even thank the mixer for not squishing it. He was quite an ungrapeful one.

Take your stinking paws off me, you damned dirty grape!
– Planet of the Grapes

Why are squashed grapes so sensitive?
– They always let out a little wine.

Grape dried?
– It’s okay, everything happens for a raisin.

If it were up to me, I would re-wine this day, I swear.

I feel so happy I want to dance and do pirouettes.
I hope that whoever eats me will be filled with energy and joy!
I want to hug you!
– The Grapes of Happiness.

My brother was choking on a grape, so he stood still, concentrated a bit, and concord it.

Ran into dried grape at the gym today. He sure was raisin’ some weights.

The savvy wine drinkers know that before they have a big party at their houses they always lock up those bottles in a wine cabernet.

Why couldn’t the grape help his friend move on Saturday?
– Because he was in a jam

I live for dried grapes.
They are my raisin d’etre…

A grape met with an accident. His mother in the hospital said:
– “I hope the doctors gave him some medicine so that he doesn’t wine”.

Did you hear about the dead grape
– It’s raisin hell

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