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Grape puns in 2025

There was once a old grape farmer, who had gone through many droughts. When his grapes had fallen and dried out, all he could say was….
Everything happens for a raisin.

The grape teacher loved teaching. When we asked her how she manages, she said: “Teaching is my jam”. She truly is a grape. If you think this grape pun is cute, you’ll likely like these irreverent school jokes.

You can always tell which of the wine tasters is there for the first time by that blanc look on their faces.

A grape wanted to go out in the sun, the others in the bunch said, “You are being unraisinable.”

Two fresh grapes met at the beach and fell in love. Soon they were raisin kids.

Everything happens for a riesling.

Stop smiling! What do you think you are, some fun guy
– Shucks yer just sour grapes

What does (do?) a spider and a grape have in common?
– Everything, except one has 8 legs and the other is a grape.

My sister held grapes in her hand and happily said to our mom one of the popular funny grape quotes, “I love you a bunch”.

That annoying raisin just wined about how he could never achieve true grapeness.

Grapes of wrath

My friend once had to present an essay in the history class. He started, “Many grapes were berried alive during the grape depression” he loves grapes a little too much, I think.

Why did the grape get disqualified from the limbo championship. He kept raisin the bar.

You’re wine in a million.

Why was the man not bothered or upset that someone had stolen all his dried grapes?
– He had no raisons to be…

People ask me why I hate grapes
– I have my raisins

Have you guys tried out the New Mexican white wine yet?
– It’s a Pinot Gringo.

What do you call a spittoon in a wine bar?
– Grape expectorations.

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