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Grape puns in 2025

Did you hear about the dead grape
– It’s raisin hell

I accidentally crushed a few baby grapes. I didn’t mean to, but now they all started wine-ing.

I was walking by a kindergarden with my girlfriend, when she suddenly started throwing dry grapes at the kids.
– At that moment I knew she was good at raisin children.

It isn’t good to keep things bottled up.

There’s a green and purple grape.
– The green grape says to the purple grape, “Breathe, breathe!”

Grape’s don’t cry when they get crushed…
But they do let out a little “wine”!

What did the grape do when it was stepped on?
– It let out a little whine.

There were a ton of complaints about the service at that banquet
– because whoever served the wine did a pour job.

What did the green grape say to the purple grape?
– Breathe.

My sister hates grapes. When I asked her why, she replied, “Well, I have my raisins”. Sure she is quite stubborn about her raisins.

A grape falls off a wine and dries. Everything happens for a raisin.

I think I might be adopted!
– The Grape Family

During dinner, I turned to my wife and said, “I used to be grapes.”
She said, “Huh?”
– Me: Sorry. That must have been the wine talking.

What do you put as one of the Instagram captions on the day that you have grapes in the morning?
– “Have a grape day”!

It’s time to wine down.

How does a loaf of bread validate it’s anger against grapes?
– Raisining!

My dad says that dried grapes are risky beef marinades, and still, once in a while, he ends up raisin the steaks.

Whoever discovered raisins, it was a grape idea.

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