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Hand puns in 2025
My mom was angry with my brother and she slapped him with a handful of coins on his face. I am sure this time she slapped some cents into him.
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(0) When I asked why he said “don’t you know the rules for screwing? Righty tighty lefty loosey”
(0)(0) A person with no arms and a knife in his mouth can still technically be called armed, just only to the teeth.
(0)(0) What do arms do when you get sad? They give you a shoulder to cry on.
(0)(0) What would you call a vocalist singing with a hand shower? A Faucetto.
(0)(0) I went to my doctor and told him that I broke my arm in two places. He advised me to stop going to those places.
(0)(0) I recently found out that my sister got a tattoo of diamonds, spades, clubs, and hearts on her arm. I guess I’ll have to deal with her later.
(0)(0) What would you call a toddler running towards her mother with her arms high up in the air? A pick-me-up.
(0)(0) How many fingers does it take to make an octopus laugh?
Ten Tickles
(0)(0) After coming home from grocery shopping with my mom, I was trying to unlatch the door with one hand and asked my mother, “How do one-armed mothers do it?” she replied, “Single-handedly”.
(0)(0) Wash your hands like you’re Nigel Farage and they’re covered in the consequences of Brexit
(0)(0) My right arm was hurting horribly between 9 A.M. and 11 A.M. It was the worst case of the ten-ish elbow.
(0)(0) What’s the name of the condition in which twins who are connected to the elbow always laugh together? Conjoined humor.
(0)(0) Cut my finger while I was baking …
You can’t get blood out of a scone.
(0)(0) My sister broke her fingers after an accident. When the doctor came in and asked her a question about how she was feeling now, she said, “With my elbows mostly”.
(0)(0) If I have 10 cookies and you take 5, what do you have? A broken hand.
(0)(0) I was waking up, and suddenly out of nowhere, a fly fell on my wrist. I saw it die on my watch.
(0)(0) Did you hear about the security robot who was unable to stop intruders because of faulty shoulder bolts? It was quickly disarmed.
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