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Hand puns in 2024

How many fingers does it take to make an octopus laugh?
Ten Tickles

After coming home from grocery shopping with my mom, I was trying to unlatch the door with one hand and asked my mother, “How do one-armed mothers do it?” she replied, “Single-handedly”.

Wash your hands like you’re Nigel Farage and they’re covered in the consequences of Brexit

My right arm was hurting horribly between 9 A.M. and 11 A.M. It was the worst case of the ten-ish elbow.

What’s the name of the condition in which twins who are connected to the elbow always laugh together? Conjoined humor.

Cut my finger while I was baking …
You can’t get blood out of a scone.

My sister broke her fingers after an accident. When the doctor came in and asked her a question about how she was feeling now, she said, “With my elbows mostly”.

If I have 10 cookies and you take 5, what do you have? A broken hand.

I was waking up, and suddenly out of nowhere, a fly fell on my wrist. I saw it die on my watch.

Did you hear about the security robot who was unable to stop intruders because of faulty shoulder bolts? It was quickly disarmed.

Which is the best hand to write with? Neither. One should always write with a pen.

Never take out the bread earlier from the toaster. You’ll burn your hand and it’ll be quite toasty.

One arm told another arm a joke. The other arm found the joke very humerus.

Have you heard the story of the campanologist that had no arms? No, that doesn’t ring any bell.

What do you call an artist with brown fingers ?
Pickasso.

I caught a bee in my hand and started shouting beauty looking at my friend. Little did she know, ‘beauty lies in the hand of bee holder”.

Omg I love my new snake skin gloves, oh wait that’s just my new hand skin washing them 17,000 times a day

I bumped my arm last week when I was digging for gold. It was a miner injury.

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