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Hand puns in 2025

Broken arms can be annoying, but we think broken arm or not, you will find an arm joke that will ease your pain.

What did the boy with no hands get for his birthday?

I don’t know. He hasn’t opened it yet.

Why can’t people with no hands tell what’s wrong with a picture? They cannot quite put their finger on it.

I was trekking through the forest, when I was astonished to see a deer attack a bear . I exclaimed, “Oh deer, he’s gonna fight you with his bear hands!”

I am directing a musical about a girl with a fractured arm. It has an excellent cast.

How did an octopus beat a shark in the fight? The octopus was well-armed.

A friend of mine cut his finger off at work…
I suppose he’ll be getting severance pay.

I got my arm transplant done at a great money price yesterday. It sure was discounted at the second-hand store.

Can’t wait til this is all over and I never have to wash my hands again

There was an explosion on an aircraft carrier that damaged most of the crew’s legs and arms. The clean-up of the disaster was all hands on deck.

Why did the elbow ask the shoulder for help? Because the elbow was elbow deep in trouble and needed help to get out.

If I had known I had ketchup on my fingers, I wouldn’t have rubbed my eyes.
Heinzsight’s 20/20.

Yesterday a thief stole all the hand-sanitizers from the grocers. He sure made a clean getaway after all.

Not every person is humerus. I always tell them that they should arm themselves with more jokes.

What would happen if you started reading ‘The Pirate’s Wrist? You’d get hooked.

My Grandfather never threw anything away, bless him He died in the war holding on to a hand grenade

Why can everyone clap with their hands except T-rex? Because they are extinct.

One arm told a joke to the other arm. I am sure the other arm found it very humerus.

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