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History puns in 2025

Two wrongs don’t make a right.
– But two Wrights did make an airplane!

A salad that requires to be eaten with 23 knives is called a Caesar salad.

How was the Roman Empire cut in half?

– With a pair of Caesars.

What was King Arthur’s favorite game?

– Knights and crosses.

The English Pilgrims’ favorite type of flower is the May Flower.

Vikings used to send private messages using the Norse code.

Napoleon may not have designed the coat he wore, but he did have a hand in it.

When Napoleon died in the explosion, he was blown-apart-e.

What did Mason say to Dixon?
– We’ve got to draw the line here!

In my many years, I have come to the conclusion that one useless man is a shame, two is a law firm, and three or more is a congress.

If you need an Ark, I Noah guy.

Last night on Dancing With The Tsars, Peter and Catherine were great but Ivan was terrible.

One of the funny puns uttered by Mark Twain is that denial is not just a river in Egypt.

What did Richard III say when a planning proposal was submitted for building parking lot?

– “Over my dead body”

Gordon Ramsey shouted at Queen Mary because she was burning everything.

When I asked my History teacher if he knew about Einstein’s origin and history, he said, “I am relatively aware of it.”

What kind of music did the Pilgrims like?
– Plymouth Rock!

How did Louis XIV feel after completing the Palace of Versailles?

– Baroque.

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