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History puns in 2025

What kind of tea did the American colonists want?

– Liberty.

The early ages in history are called the Dark Ages because there were too many knights.

England is the wettest country because many monarchs reigned there for many years.

If someone else had flown first, it just wouldn’t have been Wright.

When the History teachers wanted to help out students who were failing the subject privately,
– they put up a poster on the school bulletin boards that said, “Need Tudoring?”

Who invented fractions?
– Henry the 1/4th!

Why did Karl Marx dislike Earl Grey tea?

– Because proper tea is theft.

I wouldn’t say I liked the documentary that I had watched on the history of WD-40. It was non-friction.

I wonder why Lenin didn’t realize that communism would fail to work.
– There were so many red flags everywhere.

It is no wonder that Thomas Jefferson was thus named, his father was after Jefferdad.

A Frenchman walks into a library and asks for a book on warfare.
– The librarian replies, “You’ll only lose it.”

After the Palace of Versailles was completed, Louis XIV felt Baroque and roll.

When the teacher got frustrated because the students weren’t paying attention to the class about Isaac Newton,
– he exclaimed, “Don’t you understand the gravity of this situation?”

Why were the early days of history called The Dark Ages?
– Because there were so many knights

A Roman walks into a bar. He holds up two fingers and says,
– “Five beers, please!”

A snake’s favorite subject to study in school is Hisssstory.

Why were the early days of history called the Dark Ages?

– Because there were so many knights.

When Julius Ceasar got defeated by Brutus in ‘Battleship,’ he said, “A2 Brute?”

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