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Kitchen puns in 2025

Yesterday, I bought my wife a cheese grater to use on cheddar and parmesan, both of which I hate. It was the grater of two evils.

Aerosmith loved Chinese food, and as a result, they gave a perfect tribute to it with their song ‘Wok This Way’.

I’ve been experimenting with attaching various kitchen utensils to my power drill
I got mixed results.

Turnip the beet!

A sous chef was hired by a cannibal. The only reason being, the latter wanted a hand with dinner!

While cooking, I got stressed and screamed at my colander, and now I have a strained voice!

My wife told me to stop stealing her kitchen utensils or else.
But that’s a whisk I’m willing to take.

I bought a complete set of kitchen utensils off an infomercial. I was frustrated that there was nothing to mix my eggs…
…but to be fair, they did say it was whisk-free offer.

I saw an Italian man cooking pasta with a flame thrower. I cannoli imagine what he was thinking.

If I put dull-tasting food in a bowl, will it have a bowlder taste?

You wouldn’t know it by looking at him, but my friend is a natural at remodeling kitchens.
He’s counter intuitive

For the lobsters in the kitchen….
…the sinking of the Titanic was a ‘miracle’.

A fly got stuck in the strainer. A chef who saw it exclaimed, “You got yourself in a fine mesh”.

I visited a monastery the other day and as I walked past the kitchen I saw a man frying chips. I asked him “Are you the friar?”
– He replied “No, I’m the chip monk…”

Shake it like a polaroid picture.

I’m trying out this new kitchen set with no egg beater
The says it’s a 30 day whisk free trial

I got tired of fighting straw… So I hit the hay.

What do gorillas and orangutans wear in the kitchen?
– Ape-rons.

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