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Lawyer puns in 2024

We should know that your exquisiteness is not a crime but stealing my innocent heart does.

What separates a good lawyer and a bad lawyer?
– Your case dragged on by a bad lawyer for years. But a good lawyer takes even more time to solve it.

What do lawyers wear to work?
– Law suits

Clowns are most commonly jailed for mans-laughter.

The jellyfish asked his father, an attorney, “Dad, why did that clownfish go to prison?”.
– “Well, because he was gill-tea”, replied his father.

Are you pro-bono or just happy to see me.

What is brown in color and looks absolutely interesting on a lawyer?
– A Doberman.

Lawyer – Is it crime to throw salt in someone’s eyes?
Judge – Yes, that’s assault!
– Lawyer – I know it’s a salt but is it a crime?

If I said you were sexy, would you sign this form indemnifying me against sexual harassment litigation?

A barrister was embroiled in a complex money laundering case. In the end, he forfeited his claims
– because he didn’t have the testi-money ready.

What would you call an advocate with an IQ score of 50?
– Senator.

Let me wonder how you can be the lawyer who can defend all my acts for stealing your heart.

The prosecution can rest at my place tonight.

What did the lawyer name his newborn daughter?
– Sue.

What is the dissimilarity between a lawyer and a jellyfish?
– One is a toxic blob and has no spine and another is a pattern of sea life.

What does a lawyer wear to work?
– A lawsuit!

If loving you is a crime, then I’m looking at a life sentence.

Hey baby, how about we head back to my place, and we make a nudum pactum?

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