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Meat puns in 2025

From my 8yr old: What’s the difference between roast beef and pea soup?
– You can roast beef, but you can’t pee soup!

What’s the name of the meatiest Knight of the Round Table?
– Sir Loin!

If a liberal is a vegetarian, he wants all meat products banned for everyone.

The butcher had over 20 types of cured cylindrical meat for sale.
– I never sausage a selection.

Why does sandwich meat have webbed fingers?
– Because it’s in bread.

Why do people get nervous around stoned beef?
– Because the steaks are high.

Did you hear about the man who went vegetarian but really regretted it?
– Becoming a vegetarian was a huge missed steak!

bartender asks the cannibal “anything for you?”,
– so he replies, “no thanks, i’ll wait till they’re done

If you receive a picture of some meat in a tin from me to your email address…
… don’t worry, it’s just spam.

I beat my meat frequently
– My arm hertz a lot afterwards

What did one dairy cow say to the other?
– Got milk?

People who sell meat may be gross. But people who sell vegetables are grocer!

What’s a cow’s favorite moosical note?
– Beef-flat

I walked in on my son beating his meat
– I didn’t know he got a job at the deli!

What beef only comes in 2, 3, 5, 7, or 11 ounce portions?
– Prime Rib!

What is a hair stylist’s favorite steak?
– A flat iron!

How many meat eaters does it take to change a lightbulb?
– None, they would rather stay in the dark about things.

The other day I invested in a meat company.
– I bought a 20 percent steak.

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