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Milk puns in 2025

I love almond milk. It’s unlike any udder milk.

I can’t drink milk. I lactose genes required to digest it.

If you ever want to read a book to some cows, the one I’d go for is Ha-ricotta and the Sorcerer’s Stone.
– They love that book.

You always end up with milk on your lip after a glass of milk. Nice moostache.

Where did the cow write everything about her life?
– In her dairy.

I sent my cows to bed at 8pm last night. I told them ‘it’s pasteur bedtime’.

From where does a Russian source his milk?
– From Mos-cow.

I used to have an epic company for milk from dairy cows. It was called Legend-dairy.

Where does the mortitain buy his milk?
– The coroner store

What would you call someone who cheats others while selling milk?
– A skim artist.

The spoiled milk always got what it wanted.

A cow found out an embarrassing secret about me and just wouldn’t let it go. She milked it for all it was worth.

So I asked Satan if he had any milk I could drink…
– He told me “No whey in Hell!”

What do you see in a boxing match between cows?
– A kno-cow-t.

My cousin loves milk from Spain. She’s always drinking soy milk.

What do you call two Milk Duds fused together?
– Milk Dudes!

A cow that’s unable to produce milk – would you call it a milk dud?
– Or perhaps you may call it an udder failure.

If there was a material made of milk which could store electricity…
…it would be called buttery.

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