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Milk puns in 2024

My friend told me he doesn’t like milk.
– How dairy

Why did the man call his cow stupid?
– Because she never udderstood a word of what he said to her.

Did you hear about the scandal at the dairy factory?
– They were skimming a bit off the top.

Astronauts can’t open milk bottles in space. ‘In space, no one can. Here, use cream’.

I don’t mind the first of the two cows, but I prefer the udder one.

What’s Bernie Sanders favorite milk? not 1%
What’s Bernie Sanders favorite milk?
– not 1%

What kind of design does a cow like on her garments?
– Embroi-dairy.

The hardest thing about going vegan is milking the almonds.

What did the cow say to his friend when they met twice in the same day?
– “What a cow-incidence!”

I do love dairy milk, but I prefer it when it’s churned. It’s butter that way.

Can you see in a big vat of milk?
– Not once it’s past yer eyes!

I’m worried that the milk I got this morning was from a cloned cow. It tasted exactly like the milk I had yesterday.

Spoiler alert! The milk’s gone off.

Lots of cows struggle to put on weight. The problem is, they don’t eat full meals – they are usually grazers.

I squeezed a lemon into my mom’s milk carton. She was really sour about it.

Which substance abuse is the cow most prone to?
– Cow-caine.

Soy milk
Is the only food that tells you what it is.

I tried wild ox milk
– Turns out I’m yak-tose intolerant

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