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Mustache puns in 2025

What do you call a mustache soaked in urine?
– A pistachio.

When my father accidentally got rid of his beard, he did not go out to shave his face.

What did the bearded man say to his professor when he was running late?
– I mustache you a question but I’m running late.

I noticed that all the women were drawing on their eyebrows, so yesterday I went to work with a drawn-on moustache. Imagine my surprise when everything called me an idiot!

I just don’t get some people. I mean, you compliment on their mustache out of sheer politeness…
…and all of a sudden she hates your guts.

While eyebrows the internet, you must-ache a question to yourself whether to mullet over or not!

The Razor is very popular these days.
They offer the most amazing cutting edge technology.

Grow it while you can mo it.

I had no idea that my wife had placed a fake moustache on the squash. When I went to pick it up, it really caught me off gourd!

Why gypsies boys let their mustache to grow?
– To look more like their mom.

I mustache you a question on how to grow such incredible facial hair! You grew it so must-fast!

What made me less skeptical about growing a mustache?
– Well, the idea started growing on me.

Moustache mania, a great idea is growing right under your nose.

Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Mustache.
– Mustache who?
I mustache you a question, but I’ll shave it for later.

I hated the way I looked after I shaved my mustache…
– But then it started growing on me.

The tribe of Genghis Khan and his army are masters in shaving and hair-cutting.
They are a truly barbaric tribe!

What did the man with the beard and mustache say at the restaurant when things got a bit heated between two guys?
– Relax, I’ve got a handlebar on the situation.

I went to this christening the other day, and the priest was wearing the weirdest outfit. He was wearing glasses, a fake nose, a wig, and a fake moustache. I guess you could say that it was a blessing in disguise!

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