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Mustache puns in 2025

What did the man with the beard and mustache say at the restaurant when things got a bit heated between two guys?
– Relax, I’ve got a handlebar on the situation.

I went to this christening the other day, and the priest was wearing the weirdest outfit. He was wearing glasses, a fake nose, a wig, and a fake moustache. I guess you could say that it was a blessing in disguise!

Why did the hipster burn his mustache on his coffee?
…he was totally drinking it before it was cool.

Every student must-ache a question to their teacher,
– but some think of shaving it for later.

A friend of mind loves to groom lions.
It is his mane income.

Happy mustache-ing this Movember.

What did the philosophical moustache say about the suffering of the world? A moustache must ache!

I spent 20 years traversing across the globe searching for the best mustache…
… Until I realized the best mustache was right under my nose the whole time

The funny old must-achy man told a tiny child “have a fan-tashe-tic birthday, my love.”

What did the man tell his teenage son when he was getting late for school?
– It looks like you should shave it for later.

I moustache you a question, but I’ll shave it for later!

NSFW – a friend of mine told me he’s getting it on with his girlfriend and her twin. I asked how he can tell them apart… it’s easy he said
-Her brother has a mustache.

My dad said there’s a throbbing pain coming from the facial hair above his upper lip.
– It mustache.

When my father started losing hair, he shaved his entire head and facial hair.
It was indeed a bald move!

What do you call a cow’s mustache?
– A moostache.

What’s another name for centipede? A wall moustache!

I couldn’t find my mustache for a week
– It was right under my nose the entire time.

When a bike grows a beardy mustache;
– it is none other than a handlebar.

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