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Nut puns in 2025

Why do squirrels make poor jokesters?
– Because all their puns are nutty.

Two peanuts walking down the road, one was assaulted…

What did the squirrel say when it left?
– I will start my journey today and I wal-nut fail!

If I’m acting silly, I guess I’m acting like a nut.

What is the wealthiest nut ever?
– a cashooo.

Why do some peanuts need a trainer?
– Some of them are afraid to come out of their shell.

What kind of nuts always seems to have a cold?
– Answer: Cashews

I must be rich because I have all the cash-ews.

Truck drivers who haul almonds are driving me nuts!

Why are cashews great at chasing criminals?
– Because by their nature they cashew the best.

Why do comedians often start their act with peanut butter jokes?
– They love to warm up the crown by spreading the laughter.

I just got over my addiction to chocolate, nuts and marshmallows.
– I have to admit it was a rocky road.

If you don’t like my jokes, I guess I’m acorn-y.

What would the hanging nuts be called?
– Walnuts.

Did you hear about how Planters is planning to launch an astronaut in space?
– They call their candidates for space astro-nuts.

Archaeologists in Egypt have discovered a pyramid covered in chocolate and hazelnuts. It’s believed to be the tomb of Pharaoh Rocher.

I walnut forget your birthday, that’s for sure.

You could say that our family is like fudge. Mostly sweet, with a few nuts!

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