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Oyster puns in 2025

What kind of noise annoys an oyster
– A noisy noise annoys an oyster

Why don’t oysters donate to charity?
– Because they’re shellfish

It all starts with s-hello.

The world is my oyster
– And I have a shellfish allergy

H-oyst (hoist) the sails.

Sand you my love.

What would happen if an oyster witnessed a mafia killing?
– He would clam up.

That really shucks.

The police sea-zed the party.

Can you believe people actually eat mountain oysters?
– Isn’t that nuts?

Why don’t oysters share their pearls?
– Because they’re shellfish.

Shell yeah, bro!

What do you call male oysters?
Boysters. What do you call bodybuilding oysters?

Hoisters. What do you call oyster pirates?

Ahoysters. What do you call oyster nuns?

Cloisters. What do you call oysters that live under water?

Moisters. What do you call shy oysters?

Coysters. What do you call working class oysters?

Employsters. What do you call oysters with an evil plan?

Ploysters. What do you call singing oysters?

Voiceters.

I should stop before this gets worseter.

The party’s h-oyst (host) was really friendly.

Beach yourself.

What did the the grain of sand say after it made it’s way out of the oyster?
Whew! I’m nacred…

Shucks to be you.

Why are oysters the best at crowd control?
– ’cause they always be screamin’ : “ALLRIGHT EVERYBODY CLAM DOWN !!!”

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