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Paper puns in 2025

The Terminator found the toilet paper in Aisle B, Back.

A cop pulled me over and said “Papers”.
– I yelled “Scissors” and drove off.

Ever wondered why a piece of paper never wins a race?
– Because paper is stationary.

I made a paper plane last night and was about to make it fly when my brother said he wants the A4 seat.

Mother paper has to do everything for her family.
Her daughter tried to take some of the jobs off her but she doesn’t shred.

I saw an advert in the paper “Yacht for sale”.
– As if people dont know what a yacht is for.

How does toilet paper feel at the end of a long week?
– It feels really wiped.

What did the sad paperclip say to his friend?
– I’m barely holding myself together.

The new movie on graph papers is a disappointment.
The plot is very much predictable and the special f(x) isn’t that great either.

Never trust math teachers who use graph paper.
– They’re definitely plotting something.

How can a cardboard gun be reloaded?
– With paper clips.

There is a similarity between the local newspapers and my blood. Both consist of type O.

I am starting to write a book about an x-axis and y-axis on a piece of graph paper.
– But I can’t figure out what the plot is going to be.

Wanna hear a joke about paper?
– Never mind—it’s tearable.”

Why isn’t there any more brown envelopes in the mail anymore?
– Because apparently, the white ones get through the system faster.

There was an unexpected wiggle on the graph paper.
– I think this is what you can call a plot twist.

The paper got tense
– because a student was about to solve some grammar quizzes on it.

A pirate wearing a paper towel on his head walks into a bar. The bartender asks “What’s with the paper towel?”
– The pirate says “Arrr matey, I have a bounty on me head!”

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