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Purple puns in 2025

It purplexes me that our neighbors don’t like our lilac house.

Purple fruits are the most hopeful of all the fruits. They truly believe that they can achieve grapeness.

My 10 year old daughter just told me this one. “What did the green grape say to the purple grape?”
– “Breathe you idiot, BREATHE!”
I’ve never been so proud.

Charles Darwin always chooses the purple choc from the quality street tin.
It’s a natural selection.

Son: What rhymes with purple?
Dad: No it doesn’t.

What’s your least favorite color?
– Mine is purple. I loathe it more than red and blue combined.

What do you call a male cow wearing a pink shirt, orange shorts, and a purple backpack?
– Adorable

What did the green grape say to the purple grape?
– Breathe man! Damnit, breathe!

Which country has a queen as head of state and is also purple?
– Grape Britain.

Have you heard of a cat’s favorite color?
– It’s purrrple, of course.

What did the green grape say to the purple grape?
– BREATHE, YOU IDIOT!! BREATHE!!!!

My friend was forced to swallow a large amount of purple food coloring. He feels horribly violated.

There’s only one difference between pink and purple… The strength of your grip.

What did the Green grape say to the Purple grape?
– “BREATH MAN, BREATH!!!’

I think I look great in purple
– It really makes me look like a prince among men

Ultra violet light is the one light that is considered to be Autistic. Well, it’s definitely on the spectrum.

Charles Darwin apparently always chooses the Purple One from the Quality Street selection box. This is natural selection.

What did the green grape say to the purple grape?
– Breathe grandpa, or they will have to put you in the box! (Raisin joke on top)

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