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Science puns in 2025

There is not now, and never will be, a language in which it is the least bit difficult to write bad programs.

Let’s get PHYSICS-cal

A sign outside the chemistry hotel reads, “Great Day Rates, Even Better NO3-‘s.”

Watt is love?
-Baby don’t hertz me.

I feel like I’m diagonally parked in a parallel universe.

Werner Heisenberg’s assistant walked into the lab to find everything was covered in bits of rope and yarn.
– He’d been working on string theory again.

There are two types of people in the world
-Those who can extrapolate from incomplete data.

Einstein developed a theory about space — it was about time!

A subatomic particle sat pulling faces at the wall.
– It was a strange quark.

It is easier to change the specification to fit the program than vice versa.

Don’t give the phone to a biologist, they can’t stop taking cell-fies.

One tectonic plate bumped into another and said, “Sorry, my fault.”

The name’s Bond. Ionic Bond.
-Taken, not shared.

Hand over the calculator; friends don’t let friends derive drunk.

Einstein dreaded Christmas.
-The whole family would come round, and he’d spend the entire day trying to work out a new theory of relativity.

What did the thermometer tell the graduated cylinder?

A physicist woke up feeling ill.
-“My head hertz,” he said.

A piece of wood got a job on the train, but got fired the next day.
-It was a poor conductor.

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