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Sewing puns in 2025

A criminal went to the tailor and thread-end the tailor to stitch him a blanket.

“Girl: Hi Doctor, have you found out what my condition is yet? Doctor: Yes, do you like sewing? Girl: Yes, but what does that have to do with any of this? Doctor: You seam-stressed.”

I play with scissors for the shear fun of it.

Girl: Hi Doctor, have you found out what my condition is yet? Doctor: Yes, do you like sewing? Girl: Yes, but what does that have to do with any of this? Doctor: You seam-stressed.

Housework is for those who do not know how to knit.

Telling you a joke about a blunt needle is pointless.

When the old frock was fired from her job, all her resources got de-pleated.

Betsy: So sewing puns seam to be my typing quirk now

What did Jean-Luc Picard say when Engineering offered to fix his electric sewing machine? Make it sew!

I might look like I’m listening to you but in my head, I’m sewing.

My mother was sewing a quilt for me and asked how it was. But I refused to make a blanket statement.

I accidentally uploaded a question about embroidery on the wrong thread.

What does a seamstress say to get your attention? A-hem.

My wife’s sewing machine isn’t working properly. Not sure what’s wrong with it though, it just seams a little off.

Sewing doesn’t solve all the problems in the world. Sometimes you need to quilt as well.

Christmas trees are the worst at sewing. They always drop their needles.

A tailor once saw a seamstress travel via stitch-hiking.

“Why are Christmas trees so bad at sewing? Because they drop all their needles”

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