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Sewing puns in 2024

When I was ill, my mother woke up in the middle of the night and cleaned me up. She is a real night towel.

I’m a quilting grandma. Much like a normal grandma. Except much cooler.

What do you say to an angry woman sitting at a sewing machine? You seam stressed.

Blessed are the children of quilters. They shall inherit the quilts.

When I’m sewing, please don’t talk to me. I needle a little space.

Most of the embroidery jokes are sew-sew.

Sew much fabric, sew little time.

If you are freaking out over a sewing project, don’t worry. What you are experiencing is called “Seamstress’ed”. It’s a quite common phenomenon among people who sew.

You know you’re a quilter if you pet fabric.

I know, I know, my jokes suck. But I will not quilt cracking jokes.

“My dream world? A place where the fabric is free and sewing make you thin”

Wanted criminal with sewing machine at large; Police says he’s following a pattern.

Why are Christmas trees so bad at sewing? Because they drop all their needles.

To knit or not to knit, now that’s just a silly question!

Once my mother advised me on sewing, “As you sew, so shall you rip”.

The reused label team called itself a real rag-tag team.

Me at the fabric store: Should I buy this piece of fabric for my stash? Head: No, Wallet: No, Store owner: No. Husband: Heck no. Me: I’ll take 5 yards, please.

How can you tell if a sewing machine is trustworthy? If it seams legit

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