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Sewing puns in 2025

I count my salary in yards of fabric.

A few days ago, I bought a brand new sewing machine, but now it does not seams to be working.

My sister likes embroidery sew much that she communicates via it. I think she has made a sign language for herself, sew it seams.

If you embroider a message on a bedspread, you’re making a blanket statement.

I can’t remember any sewing jokes, I’m running out of materials.

Remember people will see your quilts long after you are gone. Not your housework.

A criminal went to the tailor and thread-end the tailor to stitch him a blanket.

“Girl: Hi Doctor, have you found out what my condition is yet? Doctor: Yes, do you like sewing? Girl: Yes, but what does that have to do with any of this? Doctor: You seam-stressed.”

I play with scissors for the shear fun of it.

Girl: Hi Doctor, have you found out what my condition is yet? Doctor: Yes, do you like sewing? Girl: Yes, but what does that have to do with any of this? Doctor: You seam-stressed.

Housework is for those who do not know how to knit.

Telling you a joke about a blunt needle is pointless.

When the old frock was fired from her job, all her resources got de-pleated.

Betsy: So sewing puns seam to be my typing quirk now

What did Jean-Luc Picard say when Engineering offered to fix his electric sewing machine? Make it sew!

I might look like I’m listening to you but in my head, I’m sewing.

My mother was sewing a quilt for me and asked how it was. But I refused to make a blanket statement.

I accidentally uploaded a question about embroidery on the wrong thread.

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