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Sleep puns in 2025

My partner asked why I put a watch on the bed before going to sleep.
– I told her I wanted to wake up on time.

What did the Mummy cow say to the baby cow?
– It’s pasture bedtime!

How often should you sleep in a tower?
– Every fortnight.

What would you call a sleeping bull?
– A bulldozer!

Sounds odd, I know, but now he wakes up on thyme.

I want to be cremated as it is my last hope for a smoking hot body.

Where do burgers sleep?
– On a bed of lettuce!

How do baby bats learn to sleep upside down?
– They slowly get the hang of it.

Taller people sleep longer in bed.

Why did the little boy hide sugar under his pillow at night?
– So he would have sweet dreams!

Why did the man keep running around his bed?
– To catch up on his sleep!

Did you hear about the little girl who was sent to prison for not going to sleep last night?
– She was charged with resisting arrest!

Where do tired people go to buy their food?
– A grocery snore.

What do you call a sleeping cow?
– A bulldozer.

What do you get when you eat cookies in bed?
– Crummy sleep.

What’s it called when your feet go to sleep and won’t wake up?
– Coma-toes!

What happens if you sleep on your smartphone?
– You download a nap.

What would you call a sleeping pizza?
– A piZZZa!

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