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Terrible puns in 2025

The Lion started a personal protection racket, offering gazelles protection from the lions in exchange for a fee of $10.

A dragon walks into a bar.
-“It’s hot in here” he says. “Shut your mouth” says the waiter.

Bobby broke his finger today, but on the other hand he was completely fine.

When I was young, I wanted to be a dolphin, but as I got older, my sense of porpoise faded away.

Why can’t you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom?
– Because it’s pee is silent.

My friend made a joke about the TV controller.
-It wasn’t remotely funny.

Broken pencils are pointless.

Why did the giraffe get bad grades?
-Because he had his head in the clouds.

How can you tell if the ocean is friendly?
– It waves.

The Elephant built an elaborate harness for his back, and charged other animals $15 for elephant rides.

What did the dog say when he sat on sandpaper?
-Ruff!

 I have a speed bump phobia, but I’m slowly getting over it.

To the guy who invented Zero,thanks for nothing!

I once met a pig that did karate.
– We called him Pork Chop.

Why did the scarecrow win an award?
-He was outstanding in his field.

This girl said she recognized me from the vegetarian club, but I’d never met herbivore.

Why do gorillas have big nostrils?
– Because they have big fingers.

What do you get if you cross a vampire and a snowman?
-Frostbite.

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