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Time puns in 2025

Whatever you do, don’t tick off the clock.

The bartender said “we don’t serve time travelers in this
establishment”. A time traveller walks into a bar.

Why would a tardy man stop and purchase a watch? Because he was hoping to buy time.

Got a new 24 clock yesterday and it’s broken already.  It only
lasted a day

What bugs are always found in old clocks? Ticks.

“What are you tocking about!”

What do you call a story that one clock tells to another? Second
hand information.

The wristwatch didn’t believe the story the clock was telling it.
It was second hand information.

What would an unwound clock say to the owner? It’s about time, boss.

The man across the street is always sitting on his clock. He says
he wanted to be on time.

What happens when you pester a watch? It becomes ticked off.

Do you know, the duck wakes up at the quack of the dawn.

Thinking about an old car of mine that got stuck in reverse gear.  
That took me back.

When do the best tennis players go to bed? Tennish!

What would you get if the clock and chicken cross paths? A cluck.

We call our dog Rolex, since he’s a watchdog.

My sister has taken up eating watches, but it takes a while to get
through each one. It’s time consuming.

Why couldn’t you keep the alarm clock in a jail? Because it kept running out.

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