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Wood puns in 2025

Birches keep their valuables in the river bank.

I conifer you a 20% discount if you buy your wood from me.

Trees get online the same way as humans, they just log in.

What’s the crime trees are most commonly imprisoned for?
Treeson.

In which state do most acorns live? Oaklahoma.

Trees’ favorite place to visit in the US has to be Caleafornia.

A pine tree’s favorite genre of music has to be poplar music.

I heard about one lumberjack that got fired for chopping down too many trees. He saw too much and had to go.

Dwayne “The Log” Johnson.

Why do forests have so many different species of tree in
them? Because they are part of the rich tapes-tree of life.

When lumberjacks arrive in a forest, the trees find themselves in grove danger.

It doesn’t matter to a forest when a bank closes, that’s
because they have so many branches

What’s a pig’s favorite type of tree? Mahogany

Why did the tree stop watching TV first thing? Because it was sycamorning shows.

What did the tree wear to the pool? Swimming trunks.

Saplings get educated at elementree school.

What’s a lumberjack’s favorite food? Chop Suey.

Justin Timber-lake.

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